Queen Nerd

A couple of friends of mine and I once held an informal contest to see which, among us, was the nerdiest. For the life of me, I can't remember why, but I ended up winning the title of Queen Nerd--though their attempts at dethroning me were formidable.

Anyway, in honor of that conversation--which just flashed into my head for some inexplicable reason--and my subsequent coronation, here's a list of the nerdiest things about me.

* I'm obsessed with figure skating, and I actually feel like doing violence over the cryptic new judging system.

* I own a Darth Tater. (*cough* It's Maggie's. * cough*) And I now want an Artoo Potatoo.

* I'm coveting the Jane Austen action figure that I saw in a catalog the other day. (Yes, I've read all of her books, including the unfinished ones. And her juvenalia. And her letters.)

* I have watched the entire five-hour BBC Pride & Prejudice miniseries on an annual basis for the last decade.

* I played the trombone in high school and actually won a first place medal with my trombone solo at a state competition. (Actually, I think that's what won me the Queen Nerd title.)

* I went to Girl Scout camp in junior high and performed a synchronized swim routine to the song "Greased Lightning." (And I'm pretty sure that cinched it.)

* I've seen the old school Star Wars trilogy way too many times.

* I dressed my husband and I as black and white film stars (with white body paint, black makeup, and black, white, and gray clothes) for Halloween a couple of years ago. Clever? Or nerdy? You decide.

* I like reading about politics.

* I know in gross detail why Jack Abramoff sucks and found it hilarious that his father took George Clooney to task for making fun of him at the Golden Globes.

* I own an ungodly amount of books. (Who doesn't?)

* I occasionally read feminist theory/literary criticism for fun.

* I hate it when I don't belong to a book club.

* I work for an environmental and social justice nonprofit.

* I once scared Clinton's Undersecretary of Commerce and Trade out of a press room by asking too many nerdy questions about the administration's free trade policy.

* I like karaoke.

* I still have a notebook full of deep and misunderstood poetry from college. (Kept as a reminder of why I should never, ever be a poet.)

* I do well enough on standardized tests that I could join MENSA--if I were willing to pay for it. (Note: I'm not bragging--I firmly believe that standardized tests are not an accurate measure of intelligence and have known plenty of incredibly smart people who either freeze or just bomb when they're tested.)

* I once took an adult education class in DC on FBI investigation techniques.

* I took flamenco lessons and would love to get back to it once I am able to sleep for a decent amount of time again. Although I still think flamenco is kinda cool and not nerdy....

And finally: I'm legally blind without my glasses/contacts, so I do the nerdy squint-and-crash-into-stuff thing really well.